Hey Kai! Just wanted to say that you're so strong for being completely open about this all! It's a huge inspiration to my boyfriend, who will be starting T very soon :)
I have a question for you--did you bind before you started T? And if you did, did it have any effects on your chest over time? Like stretch marks, scarring, etc.?
Hello! I was binding for about a year before I started testosterone. So in total I’ve been binding for about 2 years. My chest has definitely been malformed by binding, for a while I had some trouble breathing, especially when I wore a binder while running. I’ve also gotten welts, bruises, acne and chafing. Make sure that your boyfriend buys a few binders so that he can wear a clean one, and also make sure he doesn’t buy a binder that is too small. A binder that’s too small can hurt your chest cavity and your back/posture. Even binders that fit pose this risk, so bind with care.
OMG I'm LIEK, UR BIGGEST FAN EVAR. CAN WE MEET AND BE BFFS FOREVAER?
Excited to see you and Jenna at aki ;D~
I FOLLOW YOU ON DA and when the clock strikes 12 every night I photoshop myself into a picture with you and draw hearts ALL AROUND IT then I ceremoniously light it on fire and flush it down the toilet and cry to commemorate the way that you BURNT MY FEELINGS AND PISSED ON MY DREAMS.
I hope this isn't too invasive, but I was wondering what University do you attend? I'm from the US, but I've been looking into some schools in Canada, as well as the Vancouver area, and I figured getting first hand knowledge from some one who attends would be better than a website or brochure, where their sole purpose is to win my interest. Thank you:)
Hey Twin (: I just wanted to let you know that your a great inspiration to me.I watched you from your early videos till now.My friends always said I was kinda like you xD Idk why,(probably cuz your awesome) Anyways,You helped me discover that who I am.I'm a 14 year old FTM.(Pre everything) And when you came out as Trans to everyone,it gave me a weird feeling.So I started researching more about it and discovered that was all the things I was feeling.I'm so glad to watch you transition.And just look forward to what I'll be able to do.
My parents aren't very accepting,like at all.So it sucks really bad.But I have to get hormone testing and then consuling(says my mom,instead of gender therapy.)But how you said you were gonna go by Kai early transition,I went by Nick(Boy name of my name) but after a while it didnt seem me.So I went thro names and found Skylar,which I really liked.And I just use the middle name my parents were gonna give me.
I just can't wait to see you in all your transition (: One day I'll be transitioning too,and maybe you'll be the one watching me.
"Hormone testing" is a pretty useless method of trying to help with gender identity. On my first blood test my estrogen and testosterone levels were completely within normal female range. I was told by my doctor that very few FTMs actually have an unusual balance of hormones in their system prior to transition. Hopefully the therapy you are going to attend will be helpful :) I wish you the best!
Hi umm I'm a male but i like girls but I'm a little attracted to men I've tried to tell my mom but she thought i was joking,cause i usually I'm not not serious any advice?
You could try telling her again, but clarify that your not joking. or you could tell her something a little less straightforward and state that you don’t think that gender factors into sexual attraction. My mom seemed to appreciate that angle the most when I tried to explain my view on sexuality to her.
In simplest terms, it was the feeling of ” I want to spend time with this person”. Before, even with my closest friends, I wanted to spend time apart from them often and I felt awkward being with them for extended periods of time. With Nova, it was a level of comfort I’ve never felt before. I feel complete when I’m with her and incomplete when I’m not. I know that I can be 100% myself around her, it all comes naturally :)
I was just looking through your deviantart page and found your non-cosplay photographs.
How do you feel when you look back on that time in your life? Do you feel like you missed out on anything by not transitioning sooner?
I sure as hell do. Sometimes I get sad about it. I think I would have been able to really experience my teenage life if I had transitioned earlier. I was pretty introverted as a teen. I was relatively popular, but I hated hanging out with people because I had to put on a facade and it was exhausting. But everything happens for a reason. And I suppose that if I had transitioned earlier I might not have met my fiancee or the friends I have now.
You said that you've always known you were a boy, before you knew you were trans... what do you mean by this?
I am not transgender by identity. I identify as male, being transgender is just what’s getting me from A to B. My identity has always been male. Before I knew I was trans I was a boy who was stuck in a girl’s body and I had resigned to the fact that I could never be the way I felt. I sort of said “well, I can wish as much as I want, but I’ll never be male, so I’d mind as well make the bet of things”. It was a very sad time in my life, thought I didn’t let it show because I felt I couldn’t tell anyone. Transition gave me a way to actualize the identity that I never thought could be real. I don’t know how to explain the specific feeling of gender. I’m not sure anyone can put that into words.
What's your favorite movie? Song? Anime?
Your favorite thing to do after a long day at work or school?
Favorite book? Any other hobbies besides cosplay? (Sorry, I probably seem like a stalker. lol. I'm just curious)
For a while my favorite song is Five Becomes Four (Yellowcard) and my favorite movie… hmmm… I’m not sure i have one. Generally I can only see a movie once, I don’t often re-watch things unless I’ve forgotten most of the plot. My favorite anime series is Sailor Moon.
My favorite thing to do after a day or work/school is lounge at home wit my laptop, a movie or episode of a series, and my girl :)
My favorite book is probably still Oryx and Crake (Atwood) but the Percy Jackson series is pretty damn awesome. I like Harry Potter as well.
My major hobby is exercise. I try to go to the gym/run/workout at least 5 times a week. I love it. I also like playing sports but that requires organization which i don’t really have the time for.
How are you able to do everything at once? How do you manage to schedule your time so perfectly that you're able to keep up with a job, go to school full-time, make cosplays and cosplay skits, attend conventions, enjoy manga, anime, and games... how do you make time for all your various obligations, projects and pursuits?
... is it as impossibly difficult for you as it is for me?
2 years ago I never would have thought I could handle it. But it’s a matter of necessity right now. I need to work and I need to finish my degree. Cosplaying is very much on the back-burner for me. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed, but that’s when I put things in perspective for myself. Many people have far harder workloads and schedules than I do, that’s for sure! You gotta do what you gotta do.
When was the first time you kissed Nova? Or when you realized she was the one for you?
The first time we kissed was during a Christmas photoshoot. It was in the snow, for a picture. I remember thinking that her lips were really soft XD We kissed a few more times for photos or skits, but that was just our way of being together without admitting our feelings for one another. We both thought that the other wasn’t interested. Our first kiss as a couple was kissing her goodnight before her parents picked her up (I think, I tend to blur events chronologically XD).
I just wanted to say thankyou for been so inspiring.
I'm not really sure if I relate to you, but I've taken on a job that's not a traditional gender role to a female - auto electrician. I've been working hard doing my auto electrical apprenticeship for almost a year and a half now, and not many people have been that supportive of me -- except my parents with I’m very thankful for! Many people suggest I should be doing more feminine things rather than working on cars, trucks etc. I feel as if people are jugging me instantly. I'm not a lesbian, Trans or a Butch girl, I'm just a normal girl. Yet people judge me still anyway.
For a while, mainly in the early stages I felt upset, and a little down. But now I'm fine and happy with myself. After seeing how brave and confident you were, I figured I can be brave and confident with myself too! So I guess you sort of inspired me man.
Oh and I have a quick question too, I’m thinking of getting a cat soon, are they good pets to have?
I live by myself in an apartment, and need some company :(
I’m so glad that you have found comfort in your job. It’s a fantastic job, they say that the trades of one of the best industries to get into! You deserve much respect for not only having the courage to do what you love despite some very ridiculous (and they are ridiculous and I think that in the next decade people will finally grow out of them) stereotypes against you. Sounds like you’re excelling too, and doing all this while just standing up and being true to yourself. Keep being exactly who you are. People may assume things about you, but that’s sort of like assuming every man you meet is named Bob. It’s not true, and once you actually get to know the individual and learn their name it’s impossible to continue to call them Bob. Moderately stupid example, I know XD. I wish you luck!
Cats are great for apartments. I was a little apprehensive about getting a cat at first, because I had heard they were not affectionate animals. But my cats are both very affectionate :) it all depends on your cats individual personality I suppose XD
Was it difficult for you when you didn't pass so much? How did you handle situations when people said "well, clearly you're a girl" when you didn't pass?
P.S. I think that you're an inspiration :)
I was lucky in that I’ve always been able to pass at LEAST as androgynous. The major issue before my transition was speaking. That outed me immediately. It was tough pre-T, but I honestly don’t think it was as tough as the beginning of my transition when I was passing 40-50% of the time. Sometimes I’d pass, sometimes I would not and I couldn’t understand why. It was kind of disheartening to pass at one store, go into another store feeling great and then not pass. I’m more concerned with the opposite problem atm. I’m having a really hard time using my credit card/ID because they are female and I get “well, clearly you’re a boy”. Once in a while I’ll not pass, and it always hurts or annoys me, but it happens rarely nowadays.
Hey Twin, I just wanna start off by saying that you're my roll model. By watching your videos I've been able to come out as trans gender to a lot of people just because you gave me a lot of courage. I just gotta ask... how were you able to come out to your parents? I've been trying to get up the nerve to do it for a long time but I'm not brave enough. If you don't reply that's fine, I understand. But just another little note that I'm sure you've heard a lot, I'm proud of you ^^ - Sam.
I sucked when it came to coming out to my parents. I sent them an email, then told them to wait a few days before trying to contact me so that they could let it sink in. The result hasn’t been that bad all things considered. My mom is trying to understand (she gets major props for that), but my dad is more or less in denial (but I never know with him anyway…). My mom has told me that she was hurt that I didn’t trust her enough to express my feelings to her from the start, and she also hates that I didn’t tell her in person…
My advice is to be honest with your parents as early as possible about how you are feeling. Not “Mom, Dad, I’m transgender” (the way I did it T_T), but ” Mom, Dad, I’m having gender identity issues, this is how I feel…(explain to them).” Most parents will respond bad initially, but give it take. This is as much as transition for you as it is for them. You can’t and shouldn’t expect immediate acceptance, in reality this takes months or years.
So take a deep breath, and bring it up. The first step is a doozie, but you’ve gotten open up the dialogue somehow, otherwise there’s no way things are ever going to progress.
do you have an email for people who have questions about being gender queer or anything because that would really help me. Btw you rock!! :))
You can private message me on Youtube or DA if you wish :) I usually try to respond within a day or two. However I don’t identify as gender queer, so I may not be the best source for that, but i will try my best!
So, about that parody song North Vancouver Boys... you said it seemed to fit the stereotype pretty well, does that mean you also fit the description? I haven't actually heard the song, was suddenly wondering if you thought it fit you as well (a couple hours after I had read the comments, of course. XD;)
WELL if you wanna get technical I’m a West Vancouver boy XD My friend from work seems to think it fits the stereotype exactly, and he’s a North Vancouver boy.
I hope you can help me. So I like anime and my dad sort of accepts that however my mum thinks its stupid. So when I decided to cosplay for this halloween as naruto she says my outfit is crap because no-one will recognise it, I am just wondering were your parents ever negative about your cosplay and does the negativity decrease over time?
My parents were pretty negative about it. My mom was convinced it was some sort of erotic fetish cult for a while… It wasn’t until I showed my mom that I was actually SEWING things that she accepted it. I wore a pair of pants I had made for a costume out one day and commented off-hand that I had made them myself. She was really impressed, and went on to tell everyone that I could sew. She and my dad eagerly bought me an expensive sewing machine that Christmas XD I think, for parents, it’s all about the utility of things. With cosplay, if you give it that “home economics” spin, then parents find it easier to accept as “normative”.
How come you'r always the one to run into glass objects (windows/doors) in skits? xD (the one in Namine Lethal Sketches looked really...reboundy (is that even a word?) and in Naruto's Bad Idea... man that door must have hurt, cant really think of others where you've run into a glass object but yeah xD)
I’m often the one doing the “stunts” because I know how to do them. I can *usually* fall, run into things, get hit by things etc. and make it look real without hurting myself *too much*. It’s all about learning how to brace yourself and roll when you land! XD
I believe with ever fiber of my being that all people should be treated equally, which includes, of course, women having the same rights as men. Feminism is good and I would consider myself a feminist or at least an ally. But anything can be taken to an extreme and all rationality is lost. You cannot fight for freedom from oppression for one group of people by lobbying for oppression of another. Ignorance cannot be overcome with more ignorance. I have had the misfortune of being told, by a feminist, that I have no right to be who I am and that i should conform to an identity that is not my own. The same feminist also concluded that women are better than men and that the female sex is dominant genetically, physically and aesthetically. This is wrong, and works to undo the equality of rights that feminists have sought to achieve between he sexes.
Hey twin, what binder did you buy from underworks? i don't know which one would be effective/comfortable
Hello! http://ftm.underworks.com/ the top two compression shirts on the page are the ones I buy. One suggestion if you get the first one though, cut the shorts part of it so that you can go to the bathroom!